I have been doing a lot of thinking the last 2 days. It all started with a phone call. I was calling my Mother to find out how she cooked meat balls and it goes like this:
Brother in Law picks up the phone (BIL): Hello
Me: Hello, how are you
BIL: Good just watching the Superbowl
Me: Oh how nice... Is my Mother there?
BIL: Just a sec and I will check (puts the phone down) screams!!!! for my sister to pick up the phone. I guess she didnt get the phone in time so he continues to say GOD your stupid f*cking family is so stupid they cant even pick up a phone!!
Me: Silent (I am so pissed off that I cant think of anything to say except a nervous giggle)
This is not the first time he has acted like this and anytime I mention it he says he is just joking and why cant I take a joke. I dont know about you but this doesnt sound like a joke to me when he was as serious as a heart attach. There was NO laughing on his part there was no lightness in his voice just harshness. I have always felt that he feels that out family is beneith his and it is so far from the truth. I feel that my sister feels this way too sometimes. There was talk of them coming up here to visit for March break (when we were home at Christmas). Matt was so excited ... I told him not to get his hopes up because they never follow through or they find bigger and better plans. Now they are going to FL again with my brother in laws family OF COURSE!!! I know this might sounds really childish but I cant help the way I feel. I havent slept since saturday night because all I can think about is this and the fact that I miss my husband so much it hurts.
Sometimes I am so glad I dont live anywhere near my family anymore but then I think that is probably the reason they forget about me. They dont even call me. I always have to call them. When I need someone do you think I am going to pick up the phone and call NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I just feel so left out.
Anyways leave a comment on your opinion please... I need some major advice!!!
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Um I don't think you're being childish at all ... I think everything you're feeling is warranted. You're physically far from your family - which makes it feel like you're emotionally far. It's an awful feeling, and very real. Coupled with the fact that you're dealing with having your hubby gone - brutal. And it's hard accepting someone who is brought into the family ie BIL - you didn't pick him, your sister did - and there must be something about him that makes her happy, but when all you see if the not-so-great stuff ... it leaves a bitter taste in your mouth
ReplyDeleteYour brother in law needs to be told straight that what he is saying is not funny, and say it like you mean it, that's my big problem is being to wishy washy about how I say things when it comes to my in laws, I'm scared that I'm going to hurt their feelings but instead I give them permission to walk all over me.
ReplyDeleteIt's not childish at all, they were making plans and getting your hopes up. I have no advice for that, but I know how that would make me feel being dumped for something else.
It's hard living here without family, but the drama being so far away is nice.
I send you hugs! We are getting closer!
Thanks for the comments ladies!!! It is hard... I sometimes wish that someone could walk a few days in my shoes and see how hard it can be at times. I think I am going to talk to my sister about it. But just writting about it here helped me get some stuff off my chest so that when I do talk to her about it my feelings wont be so raw!! Thanks again for your support!!!
ReplyDeleteWe are getting closer Vanessa and that makes me so very happy :) xoxo